8 Ways To Cope with Caregiver Stress

A terminal illness or debilitating medical condition wreaks havoc on the life of the patient. But often lost in that health crisis is the effect it also has on those who care for a spouse, family member or friend.

Research has shown that the caregiver role can take an enormous toll – emotionally, physically and financially. In fact, one study found that the impact is so strong that the added stress on elderly caregivers increased their own mortality risk by 63 percent.

When stress and strain build, it often leads to caregiver burnout, with symptoms that include:

• Exhaustion (physical and emotional)
• Self-imposed isolation from family and friends
• No interest in hobbies or activities that once brought joy
• Feelings of hopelessness or helplessness
• Fluctuations in appetite or weight
• Difficulty concentrating
• Sleep problems
• Unusual irritability or anger
• Becoming sick more frequently

The role of caregiver can seem overwhelming, but there are strategies you can employ to ease that burden.

Learn all you can about the disease. By learning about the condition, you can better prepare yourself for any changes that might be coming as the disease progresses. Knowing what’s normal and what’s unusual can help with your own stress levels. Whether it’s cancer, Parkinson’s, Alzheimer’s or another condition, there are organizations that offer education and access to resources.

Ask for and accept help. Caregivers are often hesitant to ask for help or accept it when it is offered. Just remember that when family and friends ask, they genuinely want to help. Anything someone does for you will make your life easier. So, be prepared with a list (even if just a mental list) of tasks. It could be as simple as taking your dog for a walk, picking up a gallon of milk from the store, picking up a kid from school or just sitting in your place for an hour so that you can go to the dentist. Whatever it is, it will be one less thing for you to worry about.

Take care of yourself. It will be challenging to fulfill your caretaker role if you aren’t caring for yourself, too. That means hydration, nutrition, rest and exercise. Aim for at least seven hours of sleep every night. Find time to exercise daily, whether it’s a walk around the neighborhood, gardening or riding an exercise bike. And focus on nutritious foods like fruits, vegetables and lean meat, while avoiding processed and fast foods.

Meditation/relaxation exercises. Your body will benefit from anything you can do to quiet your mind and calm down your own nervous system. Look for an activity that distracts you from the caregiver role and gives you time to breathe. You can do this with yoga, tai chi, guided meditation or other exercises designed to clear your mind.

Connect with family/friends. As a caregiver, there is a danger that you will surrender your entire life while caring for your loved one. Strive to maintain your connections with family, friends and coworkers. Meet a friend for coffee. Invite a sibling out for lunch. And keep in touch over the phone and through social media.

Remember your own needs. What were the activities or hobbies you enjoyed doing before the illness struck? Look for ways to spend time doing those same things, whether it’s jogging with a friend, watching movies, taking pottery classes or hiking in nature. If you don’t have someone else who can briefly step in as caregiver, consider hiring an agency for a couple of hours here and there.

Join a support group. A support group offers a great way to learn more about your loved one’s condition and to gain insights and coping strategies from other caregivers. These networking groups are also a valuable way to learn about resources in your community.

Have an exit strategy. If you are caring for a spouse or family member, you want to do everything you can to help. It can be tough to admit, but there may come a time when you, alone, cannot provide the level of care required. Those demands could reach a point where 24/7 care is needed. Or your own health may present obstacles. Have a plan in place for what you will do when that happens. This may be a time – if you haven’t already – to seek palliative care or to consider the services of a home-health agency.